Mighty Jo Young (jothelion84) wrote,
Mighty Jo Young
jothelion84

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Did you know when you were already born, You were already you and I already me, So, take me as I am

So yeah, today seems to be the day that the numbness has finally worn off...I guess it's just been reading about people and their boos on facebook, livejournal and twitter that finally got to me - I really, really wish that I wasn't so alone. I'm not sure what I've been doing wrong these years, or why I lack the skills to form a connection, any solid connection with anyone, but the older I get the harder it is to form relationships with others and it scares me to think that all I'll ever have is all I have right now. I'm still abnormally calm about this, which makes me think that shit's going to hit fan eventually and I'll be an emotional mess any day now. The last thing I want to be is what I'm fearing I'm turning into: bitter about love and life and the loves' and lives' of others. I just can't help but see or read other couples and wish that I had a smidge of what they have and let's be honest, jealousy doesn't look good on anybody. I would like to think that I deserve to have friendships that are genuine; and deserve atleast one great romance sometime within my life, if not more than one.

In other news, I've been listening to/loving Au Revoir Simone lately and recently made an impulse move and bought all of their LP's so far and they are seriously a guilty pleasure. Not a regret and am glad I did so...they're amazing and beautiful. ♥ I really, really like them and am starting to get more and more in like with Goldfrapp. I swear I'm not a hipster. *throws shades on* 8-)
Tags: fears, friendships & relationships, genuineness, growing older, jo uncensored, love and life
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